My point being, soon I will be able to say 'seems like only yesterday I was 35.'Because it seems like only yesterday that Hayden was a non-lippy happy as a clam baby boy. I am not ready to be old and wise. I am still young and stupid. Ok, 15 years away from 50 is no longer young I admit, but I am still stupid I assure you.(Just ask that 15 year old of mine)
Hayden will be graduated and on his mission in less then 4 years. And although seeing these accomplishments of his will bring sunshine to my soul, it means he won't be home with me, his over-bearing momma everyday.
In less then 4 years my life will change ever so drastically, not only for me, but for my two youngest who Hayden is pretty much like a second father to. My baby will soon be a man, in 3 years the government will consider him a full grown one. In truth he has always seemed older then he is. He has always been my baby-man, he has taken care of me and all those around him. It really is too much for me to bear, thinking of him not being here with us, everyday.(I bet he is counting down the days, hours, minutes, seconds)
Every night Hayden goes in his room and plays basketball. He has one of those electronic basketball hoops that connects to the wall. It is SO loud, it shakes the walls in our house as he tries to beat his own personal best that no one else can beat. Yes, it is loud and it gets on my very last nerve. But tonight the sound was soothing instead of headache inducing, as it meant he was where he belongs, safe at home, with me.:)
Guess as I look back over the past 15 years and all the happiness I have been given, I should be overjoyed with anticipation of what is to come in the next 15. I do still have my funny sweet Max and Natalie to keep me young after all..and then...., dare I say.... GRANDKIDS!!! (could easily be in the next 7 years, better not be sooner!)
As for all you spring chickens out there, enjoy every last second, for your 'seems like only yesterday' will come smack you in your wee head before it hits the pillow soon, but hopefully not sooner then you can say "next year dear,could you get me a nice relaxing book for Christmas?"
3 comments:
oh dear eve, i remember feeling this same way....and now i'm the old age you're dreading! it DOES go by fast and i can hardly believe i'm 51 and my children are all adults and that they're making their OWN children! (not to mention, HOW they do that!!!!) but now the good part....i wouldn't go back to the younger days for anything....there is something so wonderful about watching your children grow up and become adults. they are even more fun, more energizing, and then they bring wives/husbands into the picture and the fun just grows. and then those grandkids....honestly, you can't even IMAGINE your life without them. its almost more intense than when you had your own children, seriously! somehow this process happens without freaking out about your age. the process is so filled with excitement for every new stage that you just enjoy it more and more. so, don't lay awake at night worrying about this....just enjoy the stage that you're at now and know that things will flow as they are meant to...and you'll find that it feels right, and the love just grows and extends to more and more people who you will also call your own.
i'm loving your blog...keep it up!
laurie xoxox
Lovin your blog Eve :) I'm feeling like a Winter Ham myself these days. Nothing makes you feel older than your kids growing up.
Oh I just reading everyones comments.. life is good!! Hey~ I am reaching 40 here soon and cannot believe it (if that makes you feel any better:)! I also have been bearing children for the past 10 years, love every minute of it, but ready for a new phase of life~ the fortys!! YAY! Keep posting! Love you and Happy Anniversary! You guys are both great people!
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